Juh Juh Juh Joe Buh Buh Buh Biden is the first President in United States history to be elected by a record 80 million dead people. No other person in our nation’s history has been elected to our highest office by so many deceased people, but it should be kept in mind that many of them, possibly most of them, never existed to begin with.
Actually this is all a joke, he isn’t really our President. So relax, we don’t actually have a senile Depends-wearing old man who can’t walk up a few steps without falling down, or add 4 and 12 together, as our President. No no, we don’t need to worry because we have a Junta running our country now. A cabal of Marxists, Globalists and powerful, greedy people run our country now, so be of good cheer while the store shelves empty out and food prices get so high that pet dogs become the sole property of wealthy people who live in barricaded enclaves. That may be an exaggeration, but that level of scarcity and poverty has happened here before and it can happen again.
Those laughing at this joke aren’t just the evil, malevolent bastards who perpetrated it, a lot of people in the EU, Russia and China are pretty happy about it too. The fact that you may suffer terribly because of it is beside the point.
So here’s a few pointers to at least help keep you fed, if nothing else. If you don’t have a freezer, buy one now and set it to at least 15 degrees below zero, Fahrenheit. Mine is set at 18 below, I’m still eating salmon I bought last summer. At that temperature your food will keep indefinitely without spoiling. Wrap it tightly to keep out air, it’s air that causes freezer burn.
White rice is an excellent source of starch and lasts forever if kept dry. White bleached flour lasts about 3 years. I’ve had it last years longer than that. All dry flour type products have weevils in them. Set your oven to 155 degrees and heat the bags for at least an hour depending on size. It kills the weevils and will make the product last much longer. Dry pastas also keep for years. Buy a pressure cooker and canning jars and learn how to use them because opportunities will arise to buy quantities of can-able food that you can preserve, and this includes most food items. Buy or make a meat smoker, like a Little or Big Chief Smoker, and learn to make jerky and smoked meat and fish, which can keep longer than unsmoked without refrigeration.
If you live in a home with a back yard, turn it into a garden. Get a soil test kit, they’re cheap, and read the instructions and use it to see what your soil needs. Then amend your soil with whatever it requires. Steer manure is the cheapest fertilizer you can buy. Make sure your soil has lots of organic content, learn to compost your garbage and weeds and so forth to add to your soil. Grow food.
One good laying hen will average an egg a day and will eat almost anything you feed it including every last speck of anything green it can reach along with every bug, and keep this up for at least 4 years during the warm months, spring to late fall. Chickens don’t lay in winter. Actually after 2 years laying declines but I have an 8 year old hen that still gives me all I need. I consider her a pet, not a good idea if it’s a matter of survival.
If you only have a front yard, and local regs prohibit you turning it into a garden, there’s lots of edible flowers you can plant to augment your diet that won’t upset the Rules Nazis. You can also set up a “flower bed” and plant potato eyes. You’ll get greenery that grows about 2 feet high and dies down in the fall, that no one will suspect is hiding a pile of potatoes, especially if you plant a few flowers in with them. Potatoes can be sliced or cut into french fries and frozen. A good trick is to set the eyes on top of the ground and pile an inch or two of straw or grass cuttings over them. Then the potatoes will grow on top of the ground instead of under it. Keep watered.
Other foods that keep for years if kept unopened are coconut oil, great for cooking, powdered milk , Nestle Nido is the best, they love it in Mexico where there’s often no refrigeration, powdered eggs, powdered butter, sugar, salt, molasses.
Be smart, prepare for the worst. As my grandmother would often cheerfully remark, “Always expect the worst out of life, you’ll never be disappointed.”